Diabetes & My Son.

I know that an article is due. Something insightful, thought provoking, with a twist of enlightenment.
And yet, I have nothing. I think about diabetes and all that it encompasses. Some issues on it, really get my goat…pre diabetes is one of them.
(A pet peeve of mine) There is so much to be said. So many new articles out there and advances that aren’t being given to those who suffer. And I really wonder….what about those children who come from low income families, how do they do it?
Provide the medical care that their children need daily to live.
And as I sit here, I really have nothing say. Must be the grey sky..

When I think about diabetes and I think of my son.
So for now, that is my starting off point. After all, that’s the reason that I am here on this site to begin with. Because of my love for him. When you watch someone you love suffer, your heart breaks. It’s so painful that really no words can ever begin to say what it is that you feel.
You worry about your kids endlessly. Are they ok? Are they doing well in school? Are they happy? When they are sick, my God the worry accelerates to unbearable proportions.
What is funny is that, when your kids are sleeping, you think….uhhh…time for myself!!! When your kid is diabetic, you think, did they take their night time insulin? You worry that they are sleeping too long.
Thinking … oh no, they could go into a low. Even while they are sleeping, you are worrying. You want to have the faith in them and in life, that they will be fine…but it’s almost haunting that feeling of worry.

My son is 18 now. And he is my heart. Last year in the blink of an eye.

(really)

our lives changed and so did we. What started off as a simple cold, and then seemingly developing into bronchitis was actually the trigger for type one diabetes. I can’t even fathom to this day how fast it happened. It took hold of his body and ravaged it.

I almost lost him. I have never seen anything like it.
You can read about the symptoms, and they really don’t seem so bad. But when you witness them in action, my God it is terrifying.

One step away from a coma…2 steps if the ambulance driver would have been more in clue as to what keto acidosis actually was. (At his age, they automatically think its well…you can guess) I begged them…”Please, he doesn’t even look like himself” his face had become so gaunt and thin! thank fully one of the ambulance drivers thought after that comment and knew what was wrong.

No it was not an anxiety attack ! It was not drugs or alcohol ! His breathing had gotten so heavy they thought the worst of him..
but she rushed him to the hospital suspecting what actually was happening.

With the Grace of God we made it and he was nursed back to health after a week in intensive care. It changed us though.
I stopped wanting to work as much and really wanted to start being a Mom.
I wanted him to feel family and know how loved he was.
You know how with working, and housework, paying bills etc, all that we live to make it in the world can really make us lost.
We lose that connection. It was at that moment, seeing him laying there, his legs turning purple and the nurses hooking him up to so many different things that I realized how disconnected I had gotten.
Just too tired at the end of the day, and far too stressed from life. I suddenly became reconnected and changed.
I suppose there is a silver lining in everything. I had gotten back what I had always had.
And now today, he really is my heart…I appreciate and love him more than anything. And although my heart does break that he has highs and lows and can feel pretty bad some days, it did bring us closer and that is something with a teenager!